Paging Dr. Theophilus.
Ok, Iâ€™d heard that the Little Rock Marathon finisherâ€™s medal was huge, but wasnâ€™t quite prepared for the sheer audacity of the thing. Races are competing for your marathoning dollar, and the gimmicks are coming out of the woodwork.
The self-proclaimed worldâ€™s largest finisherâ€™s medal sort of looks like a shovel, and appears sturdy enough for real digging. But the kicker for me is the sparkling, silver ribbon. I may reveal my bias toward 70s and 80s Sci-Fi television, but doesnâ€™t this look like a medal that Gil Gerard would have received from Erin Grey for saving the world in Buck Rogers and the 24th Century?
Better still, it reminds me of Dr. Theophilus, the frying pan robot that Twiki wore as a necklace.
April 8th, 2008 at 1:50 pm
Wow. They weren’t kidding!! That’s some serious bling.
April 8th, 2008 at 2:20 pm
yeah, and I’m not kidding about Twiki…
April 8th, 2008 at 2:34 pm
Looks like something Flava of Love would wear. If you don’t know who I’m talking about, ask your kids.
April 8th, 2008 at 2:36 pm
That medal must be the reason you drove all the way to LR, Ar-Kansas to run a marathon. So I can understand why you are justly proud of it (and the shirt, did they hand those out at the finish line?).
April 8th, 2008 at 2:50 pm
We’ll first, the chap with the Xanadu medal isn’t me. Do you think I’d be crazy enough to drive down to Arkansas just for an amazingly gauche finisher’s medal?
DON’T answer that.
April 9th, 2008 at 5:13 pm
Now I think you guys are not giving the ol Little Rock marathon it’s due. Bad t-shirts may come and go, but I’m telling you that medal probably has the half life of plutonium 239. It may one day end up in a land fill, but it is going to remain there for a long long time before it rots away.
I’m picturing finisher’s of the race trying to get through airport security to fly back home and being stuck. Not because this amount of medal is sure to set off the detector, but because a medal that size is not going to fit through the scanner!!!
April 9th, 2008 at 6:01 pm
SCREENER: What is this?
LITTLE ROCK FINISHER: It’s my marathon medal, sir.
SCREENER (looks hobbled, emaciated runner up and down): riiiiiight.
LITTLE ROCK FINISHER: No, really, I earned this in a race that only a small fraction of the population can finish.
SCREENER: Sir, are these sequins?
LITTLE ROCK FINISHER: um, possibly…
SCREENER: You’ll have to step aside sir.
LITTLE ROCK FINISHER: but I…
SCREENER (loudly, to associate): Body Cavity Search!
April 17th, 2008 at 10:54 pm
[…] seventeen days, Iâ€™ve written a Socratic dialogue starring Obama, Hillary, and McCain, presented a Studio 54 marathon medal only an undertaker would love, and extolled the virtues of Cadbury CrÃ¨me Eggs. I wasnâ€™t ashamed […]